But, she says, “as your relationship grows, it becomes more about intimacy and connection.” So if those butterflies have flown away, don’t worry—it doesn’t mean your love has died. You can’t resolve conflicts on the fly. In order for you to enjoy a connection that's meaningful and long-lasting, it’s important that you both feel emotionally supported in the relationship. Whether it’s a childhood memory, a vivid dream, or a fantasy, when you share these truths, you’re saying “I trust you,” which helps re-establish an emotional bond. Here are 9 Relationship Habits You Didn’t Know Were Normal. You should try to be each other’s biggest fans and advocates. You know what to do next! For example, “Thank you for taking the trash out every week, I know I don’t seem to notice, but it’s a big help.” Pileggi Pawelski says that gratitude is one of the most important positive emotions for thriving relationships. The single most powerful step you can take to keep a relationship solid? While you can’t expect that fuzzy sensation to last forever, you can revisit the places where the butterflies started. “Not only will having individual interests give you something to talk about,” says Dixon-Fyle, "but when you're happy with yourself, you set the standard on how others love you.”. We recommend our users to update the browser. Make your relationship stronger, and the good stuff—fun, sex, trust, affection—will be better than ever. How do you build this bond? If you’re feeling disconnected, try telling your partner a secret you've never revealed to anyone before. And that can feel very sexy. Dial her office for a quick “thinking of you” check-in. “Studies show that adrenaline increases attraction,” says Miller. No matter how long you’ve been together, there are some simple, fundamental rules of the road. Boredom, frustration and everyday irritations can douse the spark between you and your partner—and more of the same certainly won’t feed the flame. “Simply tell your partner how to dress, from sweats to formal,” suggests Dixon-Fyle. Except in a true emergency, don’t let anything interrupt “us” time. Putting them into practice isn’t always easy, but it is critical. However, as relationships grow, change, and evolve over time, you may no longer be putting in the same amount of effort you did when the relationship began. Our editors handpick the products that we feature. 2. Being able to joke around with your partner is the cornerstone of a healthy and happy relationship. Instead, Pileggi Pawelski says to identify your partner’s strengths, and pair it with yours. Relationships take work, especially if you want to keep and enjoy a healthy, happy, and long-lasting connection with your partner. Better yet, they gave us tips on how to rekindle the romance. Don’t start potentially tough talks if you’re not well rested and well fed. When you were first dating and getting to know each other, you both went out of your way to impress each other, please each other, and surprise each other. When feelings are at issue, they need to be heard. They’re like gas on a fire. When you address your own flaws and seek the best in your companion, magic happens. Do you and your partner have each other’s back? And you both feel motivated to change in ways that lead to even more joy. Check out 7 Common Marriage Myths—Busted! Here are 18 Quotes About Forgiveness That Will Make You Put Down Your Grudges. And while it’s great that you and your partner are more comfortable around each other and have a kind of closeness that wasn’t there in the beginning, it’s imperative that you and your partner keep putting in the time, energy, and effort that you did when you started dating. If you’re distracted or going out the door, pick another time to talk. And in order to make a relationship continue to feel fresh and have long-lasting potential, you and your partner should engage in new activities together, find opportunities to keep the flame burning, and trade in a night with Netflix for a night out on the town. These expert-backed tips help your long distance relationship last for the long run. While it’s certainly okay to have this low-key, quiet time with your partner, it’s important that you and your partner don’t get into a mundane routine that sucks the excitement and passion out of your relationship. Nobody takes responsibility. Feeling good about the way you look makes your eyes sparkle. Blame, insults, criticism and bullying predict a bad end, or at least a living hell. Can Your Secret Relationship Actually Work? How Do You Really Know If You're Falling in Love, Tantric Sex Techniques That Bring Couples Closer, This content is created and maintained by a third party, and imported onto this page to help users provide their email addresses. Nobody changes. First, support your partner. The result? Here are 5 Pet Peeves That Are Totally Justified, According to Science. “When expressed regularly, gratitude has been shown to be a booster shot for satisfaction,” she says. Take his or her side whenever possible if trouble arises in the “outside world.” Keep their secrets to yourself, even when everyone at work spills theirs. According to Dr. Juliana Morris, therapist and certified sex expert, one way to rekindle a flickering relationship is to literally light a fire. Long distance relationships don't have to be so challenging. In a Florida study of longtime couples, joint problem-solving ability was cited as a key factor for 70 per cent of satisfied pairs. And you may grow to resent your mate because your relationship is preventing you from doing things that make you who you are. For example, if you love to learn, and your partner is creative, take a painting class together (and bring some wine!). If your love has gone from hot and heavy to slow burn, these tips might help. With the right tools and attitude, conflict becomes a gateway to deeper intimacy—the chance to be seen and loved for who you truly are, to accept your mate’s adorable, vulnerable real self, and to build a strong union without silently seething. For more stories like this, sign up for our newsletter. “The first thing to realize about being in a long-term relationship is that it waxes and wanes,” says Miller. In order for your connection with your partner to flourish, you have to fully respect each other. Everyone is unhappy. Do you typically spend Saturday nights binge-watching shows with your partner? And if you're wondering what you can do to help put the odds in your favor and ensure that you're with your partner for the long haul, these seven key tips can make your relationship last while creating a deeper bond between the two of you. Your partner feels better because he or she feels appreciated, not chastised. That’s important, because a couple who form a tight unit can weather any storm (and are better able to stave off infidelity). Respect has to be present in the present in order for you to have a chance at a future together. And when you truly believe in your partner and want him or her to be happy and succeed in all aspects of his or her life, your relationship will likely be strong and secure enough to stand the test of time. It's always nice to be thought of, and it feels good to do something nice for your partner. A long-term relationship is beautiful, but it isn’t easy. Too late? If 15 minutes of morning yoga, a switch to decaf, or a new hobby help you relax, the good feelings can’t help but lead to happier, richer moments together. But, she says, “as your relationship grows, it becomes more about intimacy and connection.” So if those butterflies have flown away, don’t worry—it doesn’t mean your love has died. By using LiveAbout, you accept our, 8 Warning Signs That Your Partner May Be Losing Interest, Tips to Spice Up Your Long-Term Relationship, 7 Ways for Couples to Reach #RelationshipGoals, 8 Signs You're in a Dead End Relationship. Trying to improve your partner puts him or her on the defensive and casts you in a negative light. Join the discussion: What tips do you have for the community to make a relationship last? Improve Your Relationship by Relaxing. And in order for a relationship to last, this humor and excitement still has to be present. That little bit of extra intimate contact as you say good bye at the beginning of the day and hello at the end goes a long way, and keeps the flame of intimacy burning strong in your relationship. The classic advice experts give to singles seeking a perfect match: Be “the one” to attract “the one.” Same goes in a long-term relationship. And if you're wondering what you can do to help put the odds in your favor and ensure that you're with your partner for the long haul, these seven key tips can make your relationship last while creating a deeper bond between the two of you. University of California researchers who followed 79 couples for more than a decade found that early divorcers fought long and loud and were always on the attack—or the defensive. The happier you feel, the happier your relationship will be, and the easier it will be to manage conflicts. (Like…forever…actually!) She suggests rekindling the passion in your relationship by fueling yourself first: Find a hobby, set some job goals, or do charity work. Remember when you were first dating, and you'd spot your partner across the room? Time to spruce up your look. Meanwhile, admit it: You used to fuss over your hair and obsess over the sexiest item to wear to bed. Stacey Laura Lloyd is an author with a passion for helping others find happiness and success in their dating lives as well as in their relationships. “It’s difficult to feel attracted to someone who has lost their autonomy and individual identity,” says Dixon-Fyle. If you’re unable or unwilling to talk freely with your partner, express your true thoughts, and be vulnerable around him or her, your relationship won’t last because there isn’t a strong and solid foundation between the two of you. Then use a pit, or burning bowl, and “set the papers on fire with the intention of releasing the negative feelings.” When done correctly—as in ensuring that the focus remains on healing and moving forward, and not dredging up the past—Morris says that this can be a “fun and freeing practice.”, It may seem counterintuitive, but to get heat back, it may be best to take the sex out of it—at least for a little while. Unfortunately, that’s a sure way to suck the oxygen out of the fire. And while they may seem in love, it’s the adrenaline rush and endorphins that help speed things along. Make a commitment to spend up to 30 minutes a day chatting with each other about everyday plans, goals and, yes, dreams. She suggests trying an ‘anything but’ rule: “Kiss and hold hands and go to second base, but that’s it,” she says. It’s tempting to blame your partner when you feel angry, disappointed, bored, betrayed or stressed out about your relationship. Hunger and fatigue can unleash nasty remarks and dark thoughts. You should still enjoy date nights together, keep each other on your toes, and go out of your way to make your partner happy if you want your relationship to last. When talk turns combative, don’t interrupt, offer a solution or defend yourself too soon. “When you’ve committed to having sex every day, it can be fun to anticipate it,” she says. However, it’s supposed to be overwhelmingly worthwhile. “Going somewhere you have great memories together can remind you that you’re still interesting people who like each other,” she says.